You Wonder

You wonder Why I am this way The intensity in my gaze The burden of pain, The deceit unfazed. Looming exhaustion from the nights unslept,  Dragging beneath the burdens bore too long.  I let you believe I was soft  Like my knife hadn’t been sharpened on the edge, You never thought I would pull back, Continue reading “You Wonder”

Conflicted

Conflicted Wondering if pure love exists or is just depicted Images surrounding me Hounding me Fairytales crumble in front of me Wondering why love looks back differently. Wishing it’s warmth would wash up on me I feel highs, then lows and jealousy. Wishing I knew if you were into me like I am into youContinue reading “Conflicted”

Another Night

Spent a lot time in darkness Looking for the light Lot of times shit felt hopeless, Thought I’d never get it right. I move in the night easier than the day I’ve known the moon longer than the sun So much time alone  Thought I was the only one. I’ve felt the pressure And carriedContinue reading “Another Night”

The Observer

I am the fly on the wall,  Silent, Yet present.  You wonder why I do not speak,  You do not realize,  That is because I am listening. I am analyzing,  I am understanding. I place you into frame,  I see your lightness and your darkness,  I see your features and faults,  Your movements  and mostContinue reading “The Observer”

Musings on Life & Change

You haven’t lived life until you become everything you said you would never become and do everything you said you never would do.  Everything you think you know evolves into something else and just when you think you have it figured out, the entropy of life smiles back at you.  You never know who you’ll be untilContinue reading “Musings on Life & Change”

Lost Blood

We only ever talk on birthdays and Christmas, Seems like those were the darkest days of my life you had to witness. All you saw were the surface level actions, Failing to see that I was trying to escape – Trying to find a moment of pleasure, Albeit, temporarily, In all the pain. The trueContinue reading “Lost Blood”

Letting Go

I look around my home I see the wooden parts, All of the small pieces. They are in boxes, They are on shelves, They are on the floor. I see the diagrams, The details, Scattered around the table. I walk room by room, Picking up every piece, Putting them in my arms. I bring themContinue reading “Letting Go”

The Girl in the Mirror

It is easy to go through lifeWithout looking upon your own reflection.OrTo purposely avoid it.Until you spend a period of time,With a mirror right across from you.Where you are forced to acknowledge,The girl in the mirror.The unsettling angles and curves,The colors, shapes, and sizes.Realities that could always be willfully ignored before,Now staring right back.And theContinue reading “The Girl in the Mirror”

Self Care & Car Maintenance

Like owning a car, scheduled maintenance is necessary to avoid much larger costs; Costs that are not just financial, but those that come at a personal expense as well. We may see getting an oil change as an inconvenience, something we put off. We see tire rotation as something suggested, and perhaps unnecessary. Human natureContinue reading “Self Care & Car Maintenance”